The Lower Treave Caravan and Camping Park Blog

"Bugler! ....news coming soon on 2017 .....Sound the Advance!

Scroll down for all the latest information, news and views from Lower Treave.

Tuesday, 5 January 2010

HATS, HAMPERS, SCARVES AND HAND-WARMERS!

Sometimes, Christmas presents just work out. Who could have foreseen the post-festivity cold snap and siege conditions when they wrapped these crackers up?



A hamper full of goodies to delight the tastebuds now the turkey has run out, a hat and scarf which have been constant companions since Christmas Day (it's not a great look in bed but who cares?) and a nifty little emergency pack for the car containing an ice scraper and a hand-warmer.....Perfick!

Thanks to all family and friends for some thoughtful and very useful gifts.

This year, the presents I gave were mostly pants!

Wear these; you'll keep warm, stay safe, and we'll see you in the summer!



To book on-line...but not to buy pants...go to


Remember, book early, don't be caught with your pants down!

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Sunday, 3 January 2010

It just makes me laugh every time I play it!



Check out the steps...we'll be doing this at Lower Treave this year!
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SUMMER AVAILABILITY - STATIC HOLIDAY CARAVAN SENNEN LANDS END CORNWALL

Just had a cancellation come in on this one, so it is now available, first come, first served ...

One week, commencing 7 August 2010, 4 Berth Holiday Caravan, £440 fully inclusive.

See  http://www.lowertreave.co.uk/caravan-hire.html for full details and

http://www.lowertreave.co.uk/prices.html to book on-line.




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Saturday, 2 January 2010

RAIN IN CORNWALL ... THE FACTS ... THE FIGURES ... THE FORECAST

Some of you will know that Paul (Director Estates, Wildlife and well known Bramble Maniac) is a keen amateur meteorologist. He has kindly provided the actual rainfall figures, as taken at his St Just weather station, for the last seven years.



We are all a bit guilty of allowing our weather memory to drift into myth and legend so it is interesting to see the actual figures and compare them with your perception of events. For instance, I was surprised to see that last July was wetter than July 08...but August was comparatively dry (less than half the rainfall of the preceeding month). If you were to choose a holiday on the strength of these numbers alone, then you would probably come in April, June or September. We have never had a completely dry month, but some of the readings include extreme weather events where perhaps a large amount of rain fell in just a few hours, but the rest of the month was reasonably dry.

And the forecast for 2010...well that is anybody's guess at the moment...but keep an eye on the Jetstream (the upper atmosphere wind that drives our weather systems). If it settles to the north of us, we are in for a good one. If it drifts to the south...its brollies and wellies time.

But in the final analysis, there are no guarantees. I am sitting here writing this in bright sunshine looking out at Paul (Director Estates, Wildlife and Bramble Maniac) wielding a scythe like a madman and working off the Christmas poundage with every swing of his arm. Mum has just phoned from the Midlands and it is -4c and snowing! The weather is the weather. Just get up in the morning, look out of the window and thank your deity of choice for it. Otherwise....what would we talk about!



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Thursday, 31 December 2009

Ooooo! MATRON!

For a good friend of Lower Treave who is currently under 'medical supervision'....



The one in the middle is doing the operation...

The one on the right is giving you the bed-bath...

...and the one on the left is just a figment of your imagination brought on by the anaesthetic!

Get well soon from all at Lower Treave.
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Tuesday, 29 December 2009

REVIEW OF THE YEAR

The TV is full of them at the moment...or you could just look back through the Blogwall Bugle archive...at least there's no advertising for sofas!

Just go to the panel on the right and select the month of the year you want to browse through.

Remember, nostalgia ain't what it used to be! (and neither are the jokes on this blog! Ed)




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Note to self: BOOK CORNWALL CARAVAN / CAMPING HOLIDAY NOW!

Traditionally, the New Year period is our busiest time for bookings....and this year is no exception!

Just a quick reminder to our regular guests and readers that we are running fewer pitches this year, to give everyone a little more space to relax and enjoy their holiday, so a timely booking is essential to reserve your  bit of Cornwall for the summer holiday.

You can book your holiday here: http://www.lowertreave.co.uk/prices.html


And the long-range forecast for next summer...as soon as we have it we'll post it up here...but this is what it is looking like for the rest of the winter:


Wrap up warm....and dream of a great Cornish summer.
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Friday, 25 December 2009

SENNEN MERMAIDS AND SEA MONSTERS! CHRISTMAS 2009

Just got back from the annual rite of passage known as the Sennen Cove Christmas Day Swim. Those of you of a nervous disposition may wish to look away now:



Goose grease fetches a high price as preparations are made.



A combination of a high tide and long legs make the dash to the sea mercifully short.



We're not waving...we're drowning!



Nic takes on the surf.



Julie looses her specs after an early encounter with a rogue two footer.



Nic C searches for Julie....she's behind you!



Whale? Shark? Grumpy old bugger from the campsite?



'Without my glasses it is almost impossible to find pants!'



Capt Webb and Grace Darling...a rare snapshot from history.



'Grateful' friends and relatives put away the insurance policies for another year.


Peter discovers there is a surprising amount of slack in his shorts whilst Norman explains to the ladeez how big it was before the swim. Gosh how they laughed!



Team Treave Swim 2009!



Home for cake and medals!

YouTube Swim
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Thursday, 24 December 2009

Santa's Holiday of Choice!


A VERY MERRY CHRISTMAS TO ALL OUR READERS




From us here at Lower Treave, to you, wherever you may be, have a lovely Christmas. Stay safe, stay warm, eat well, be happy and at peace with your world.
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Friday, 18 December 2009

A CHRISTMAS POEM FROM THE POET LAUREATE

1
ON THE FIRST DAY OF CHRISTMAS,
a buzzard on a branch.

In Afghanistan,
no partridge, pear tree;
but my true love sent to me
a card from home.

I sat alone,
crouched in yellow dust,
and traced the grins of my kids
with my thumb.

Somewhere down the line,
for another father, husband,
brother, son, a bullet
with his name on.

2
TWO TURTLE DOVES,
that Shakespeare loved –
turr turr, turr turr –
endangered now
by herbicide,
the chopping down
of where they hide –
turr turr, turr turr –
hawthorn thickets,
hedgerows, woodland.
Summer's music
fainter, farther…
the spreading drought
of the Sahara.

3
THREE FRENCH HENS –
un, deux, trois –
do not know
that French they are.

Three Welsh lambs –
un, dau, tri –
do not know
that Welsh they baa.

Newborn babies –
one, two, three –
only know
you human be.

Only know
you human be.

4
THE GRENADA DOVE IS CALLING.
The Condor calls from the USA.
The Wood Stork calls from its wetlands.
The Albatross calls from the sea,
on the fourth day of Christmas.

The Yellow-eared Parrot is calling.
The Kakapo calls from NZ.
The Blue-throated Macaw is calling.
The Little Tern calls from Japan, calls
my true love sent to me.

The Corncrake is calling; the Osprey.
The Baikal Teal calls from Korea.
The Cuckoo is calling from England,
four calling birds.

5
THE FIRST GOLD RING WAS GOLD INDEED –
bankers' profits fired in greed.

The second ring outshone the sun,
fuelled by carbon, doused by none.

Ring three was black gold, O for oil –
a serpent swallowing its tail.

The fourth ring was Celebrity;
Fool's Gold, winking on TV.

Ring five, religion's halo, slipped –
a blind for eyes or gag for lips.

With these five gold rings they you wed,
then slip them off when you are dead.

With these five go-o-o-old rings.

6
I BOUGHT A MAGIC GOOSE FROM A JOLLY FARMER.
This goose laid Barack Obama.

I bought a magic goose from a friendly fellow.
This goose laid Fabio Capello.

I bought a magic goose from a maiden (comely).
This goose laid Joanna Lumley.

I bought a magic goose from a busker (poor).
This goose laid Anish Kapoor.

I bought a magic goose from a bargain bin, it
was the goose laid Alan Bennett.

I bought a poisoned goose from a crook (sick, whiffing).
This foul goose laid Nick Griffin.

7
THE SWAN AT COCKERMOUTH –
of a broken heart, one half.

The Mersey Swans, flying
for Hillsborough, wings of justice.

Two, married and mute on the Thames,
watching The Wave.

A Swan for Adrian Mitchell
and a Swan for UA Fanthorpe, swansongs for poetry.

The Queen's birds, paired
for life, beauty and truth.

8
ONE MILKED MONEY TO MEND HER MOAT.
Two milked voters to float her boat.
Three milked Parliament to flip her flat.
Four milked Government to snip her cat.
Five milked the dead for close-up tears.
Six milked the tax-payer for years and
years and years…
Seven milked the system to Botox
her brow.
Eight milked herself – the selfish cow.

9
BUT THE DEAD SOLDIER'S LADY DOES NOT DANCE.
But the lady in the Detention Centre does not dance.
But the honour killing lady does not dance.
But the drowned policeman's lady does not dance.
But the lady in the filthy hospital ward does not dance.
But the lady in Wootton Bassett does not dance.
But the gangmaster's lady does not dance.
But the lady with the pit bull terrier does not dance.
But another dead soldier's lady does not dance.

10
LORDS DON'T LEAP.
They sleep.

11
WE PAID THE BLUDDY PIPER
fir Scotland's Royal Bank;
twa pipers each
fir Fred and Phil,
fir Finlay, Fraser, Frank.
Too big tae fail!
The wee dog laughed!
The dish ran awa' wi' the spoon…
We paid the bluddy pipers,
but we dinnae call the tune.

12
DID THEY HEAR THE DRUMS IN COPENHAGEN,
banging their warning?
On the twelfth day in Copenhagen
was global warming stopped in its tracks
by Brown and Barack and Hu Jintao,
by Meles Zenawi and Al Sabban,
by Yvo de Boer and Hedegaard?
Did they strike a match
or strike a bargain,
the politicos in Copenhagen?
Did they twiddle their thumbs?
Or hear the drums
and hear the drums
and hear the drums?

Carol Ann Duffy
Christmas 2009
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DUCKING AND DIVING; SWIMMERS AND NON-SWIMMERS

Here are the excuses so far for not swimming on Christmas Day:

'I've got a poorly hand and don't want to get my sling wet.'

'The Christmas lunch doesn't cook itself you know.'

'The doctor says I've got to keep my vest on.'

'I did something in the gym last week and I still don't feel right.'

'It's below my minimum safe altitude.'

'Elfs can't swim.'

'The water cooler needs servicing.'

'I can't find my trunks.'

'My new watch isn't waterproof.'

...any more???



Mr Cook takes his role as senior lifeguard and towel steward very seriously.


'Mad as a fish!'



Ladies...calm yourselves!...please form an orderly queue.

See you there!
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LAST CHANCE TO MAKE A DIFFERENCE

On Christmas Day we will all be going for a swim on the beach at Sennen Cove. It will be very cold....which I don't mind... because the alternative is quite warm...and no beach.



They can't all be mad can they?

Last chance to have a say... http://www.avaaz.org/en/save_copenhagen/98.php?

Now...where's that goose grease?
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Tuesday, 8 December 2009

HAVE YOU GOT THE BOTTLE FOR CHRISTMAS?

We've all been through the challenge of 'what is the most eco friendly christmas tree?', 'how do I recycle the tree at the end of the festive season?', 'what is my carbon sleigh print doing in all of this?' Well the answer seems to be start thinking about Christmas much earlier!

My crazy nephews have made their Christmas tree out of empty bottles (413 of them!) collected during the year. Lit by a single light, the tree stands out as a beacon to insanity on the road where they live.

The tree was officially 'switched on' by local celebrity Pauline Bliss and afterwards we all had a nice cup of tea and a couple of paracetamol.





'God rest ye merry gentlemen....(hic!)...'
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Monday, 30 November 2009

...AND THE WINNERS ARE....!

Forget the Oscars, forget the Nobel Peace Prizes, this is the big one!

We are delighted to announce that Jean Osborne and Paul Michemore have been recognised for their exceptional service to the holiday park industry by the presentation of British Holiday and Home Parks Association (BH&HPA) Exceptional Service Awards.

Their citations read...

Jean Osborne...A long-standing commitment to the highest of standards in guest accommodation and service.

Paul Michelmore...An invaluable contribution to the development, management and maintenance of the Park’s environment and bio-diversity.


The BH&HPA says...

'The Exceptional Service Award is new for 2009 so please extend our congratualtions to Jean and Paul on being among the first winners of this prestigious award. We are delighted to enclose their certificates of achievement together with their lapel badges.

Details of their achievement will be documented on the Roll of Honour in the BH&HPA Journal.

We hope that it gives Jean and Paul a big pat on the back and lets them know how much you value their contribution to the park.'

Welll done to you both!





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Sunday, 29 November 2009

SCRABBLE - Deja Vu, Ominous Portents, Signatures and Danish Pasties!

Lay awake last night in a 65mph wind thinking scrabble...you know...the well-known game where you have a handful of tiles and have to re-arrange them into a word like 'ROOF'.

We have certainly got some extreme weather at the moment, not just the wind, but almost constant rainfall...I have rarely seen the site so wet and its fortunate there's nobody on it during the winter, so the ground just keeps soaking it up. However, our problems are nothing; we spare a thought at this time for our customers, their friends, family and all the unfortunate victims of weather in the north west.

The Blogwall Bugle itself was born of an extreme weather event. Rememember August 2008? It was pretty wet, and to cheer everyone up we started to produce a one-side sheet of ramblings, gossip and pretty useless information to keep spirits up. Originally, it was called the Bogwall Bugle, on account of that was where it was posted up. Looking back through the archive, headlines catch my eye such as 'Woman Takes to Bed in Climate Change Protest' and there are some useful 'Norma's Problem Page' tips on coping with muddy conditions.


Hopefully, with the new layout of the park, this sort of thing should not happen again....However, there is a way you can help out too....

Wherever you come from, you must have heard of 'Climate Change'. I can already hear all the Daily Mail readers sucking through their teeth, but bear with me because whether you subcsribe to the 'evil man' theory or not isn't the issue here. I am not convinced by the one reason fits all augument either...I think there's a whole lot of factors involved in this, all of which have their part to play. However, what I am convinced of is that we are just using too much 'stuff' at a rate that we as a species can't manage in simple supply and demand terms or justify on the moral ground of being fair to all. So, we've just got to stop using quite as much 'stuff'' and give ourselves a bit of a breathing space until we can get all the big theories and policies lined up and sorted out.

Now, when we have a bunch of politicians coming together to talk about something as important as this, then it makes sense to first of all get them to agree to stop using quite so much 'stuff' until they know what they are talking about. It looks like all the major players are going to be in Copenhagen next month to do just that (well...hopefully). So how can you help. Well, politicians are fickle, vain characters who like to know that somebody is taking notice. To get their attention, all you have to do is sign up to the 'Footsteps to Copenhagen' declaration and lend your voice to the millions of others around the globe who are asking our representatives to show some leadership on this. Don't be put off by the fact that it has 'Truro Cathedral' in the headline...this has nothing to do with religion, it's just that the good auspices of the cathedral have kindly agreed to help out in pulling this together. And it doesn't matter where you come from....Cornwall is just one of a whole world full of places that is affected by this. So please...give it some welly...just sign....



Thank You!


You can find all the old Bugles on this blog posted back in December 2008 (see panel to the right).


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Friday, 27 November 2009

COOL, BIRD and CAGE!

Court and Social

So..What do these three things have in common?



That's right, they were all in Bath last night for the switching on of the Christmas lights. Roving Blogwall Bugle cub reporters Snickers and Water Cooler Boy bumped into Nicholas Cage as he was throwing the switches at the start of the Spa town's seasonal extravaganza.

Asked if he was intending to spend time at Lower Treave this year, Cage said 'Where?', which pretty much confirms his holiday plans.

However, the Hollywood heartthrob will be cut no slack during his sojourn under canvas...the rules quite clearly say 'Mandolin playing must be reduced to a minimum after 10.30pm'!



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Wednesday, 25 November 2009

MINACK THEATRE PROGRAMME 2010




For the theatre goers amongst you who like to plan ahead here are the latest dates we have for the Minack 2010 season.

More pre-season events will be added as dates are confirmed.


To find out when the Box Office is due to open please CLICK HERE


EASTER HOLIDAY
Disney's Beauty And The Beast . . April 2,3,4,5 and 10,11,12 . . . [MORE]


THE SEASON
Music and Comedy events - details to be announced . . . . May 15 to 21
A Mere Interlude . . . . May 24 to 28 . . . [MORE]
Jesus Christ Superstar . . . . May 31 to June 4 . . . [MORE]
To be announced . . . . June 7 to 11
James and the Giant Peach . . . . June 14 to 18 . . . [MORE]
To be announced . . . . June 21 to 25
West Side Story . . . . June 28 to July 2 . . . [MORE]
Romeo and Juliet . . . . July 5 to 9 . . . [MORE]
Le Bourgeois Gentilhomme . . . . July 12 to 16 . . . [MORE]
The Bartered Bride . . . . July 19 to 23 . . . [MORE]
On The Razzle. . . . July 26 to 30 . . . [MORE]
Moby Dick! The Musical . . . . August 2 to 6 . . . [MORE]
Love's Labour's Lost. . . . August 9 to 13 . . . [MORE]
Trumpets and Drums . . . . August 16 to 20 . . . [MORE]
Lark Rise . . . . August 23 to 27 . . . [MORE]
Hot Mikado . . . . August 30 to September 3 . . . [MORE]
The Rover . . . . September 6 to 10 . . . [MORE]
The Gondoliers . . . . September 13 to 17 . . . [MORE]
Proms at Minack . . . . September 18 and 19 . . . [MORE]



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Sunday, 22 November 2009

SEX ON A STICK




...question is, will it fit in my Christmas stocking...?
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Friday, 20 November 2009

FOOTSTEPS TO COPENHAGEN

PROBABLY THE MOST IMPORTANT POST ON THE BLOG THIS YEAR




Please, just sign it....my wellingtons start to leak round about 2011, but your kids will have damp feet for life!

Cornwall Climate Change Pledge for Copenhagen

Thank you.

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Monday, 16 November 2009

LETTER FROM THE PROF!



(Click on the letter to read and then use the 'back' button of your browser to get back to the blog.)

Saturday, 14 November 2009

HURRICANE LAUGHIN'

From Radio Cornwall this morning....

'Storms swept through Cornwall overnight causing £50,000 worth of improvements to Bodmin!'

(You couldn't make it up.)

Meanwhile, waterlevels are rising on the new pond...will be selling tickets to the flume soon. Everything is just about holding together...given that no liners or concrete were used in the construction...just hoping the force of nature doesn't have too great an effect on our efforts to help nature out!





Off to watch Exeter v Pirates this afternoon...if they put up a high ball, get ready to catch it where you live!
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Friday, 13 November 2009

PARASKEVIDEKATRIAPHOBIA

...today, I will mostly be stopping in bed!








Thursday, 12 November 2009

BESS BOWS OUT



Time to say goodbye to an old friend. Last seen on official duty at Lower Treave for the pond filling ceremony in October (see earlier post), Mum's old dog Bess has sadly died. Fifteen full and eventful years and never happier than when out on a walk, she will be very much missed.
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Wednesday, 11 November 2009

NAMING OF PARTS

Today we have naming of parts. Yesterday,
We had daily cleaning. And tomorrow morning,
We shall have what to do after firing. But today,
Today we have naming of parts. Japonica
Glistens like coral in all the neighboring gardens,
And today we have naming of parts.

This is the lower sling swivel. And this
Is the upper sling swivel, whose use you will see,
When you are given your slings. And this is the piling swivel,
Which in your case you have not got. The branches
Hold in the gardens their silent, eloquent gestures,
Which in our case we have not got.

This is the safety-catch, which is always released
With an easy flick of the thumb. And please do not let me
See anyone using his finger. You can do it quite easy
If you have any strength in your thumb. The blossoms
Are fragile and motionless, never letting anyone see
Any of them using their finger.

And this you can see is the bolt. The purpose of this
Is to open the breech, as you see. We can slide it
Rapidly backwards and forwards: we call this
Easing the spring. And rapidly backwards and forwards
The early bees are assaulting and fumbling the flowers:
They call it easing the Spring.

They call it easing the Spring: it is perfectly easy
If you have any strength in your thumb: like the bolt,
And the breech, the cocking-piece, and the point of balance,
Which in our case we have not got; and the almond blossom
Silent in all of the gardens and the bees going backwards and forwards,
For today we have the naming of parts.

Henry Reed


Tuesday, 3 November 2009

WEBSITE 2010

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New photographs, new prices, additional info...all at the click of a mouse

 www.lowertreave.co.uk
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Monday, 2 November 2009

COST 'O COFFEE



Just been notified by the Cornwall Wildlife Trust that the amount collected this year from our visitor gifting coffee scheme was £150.98

Many thanks to everyone who put a few coins into the collecting box for their coffee....we've done the sums and the average paid per cup was 8p...so what are Starbucks doing with all their money?

Don't forget, if you want to get somebody a really nice Christmas present, then try a Cornwall Wildlife Trust Calendar. Available now from their on-line shop http://www.cornwallwildlifetrust.org.uk/supportus/shop.htm
at just £5.00